Parenting Times Two – Taking Care of Your Kids & Your Parents with Twice The Love (And Patience!)
November 29th, 2011 | 
Author: by Stacey Carrington
We are called the “sandwich generation” because we are squeezed between two other generations—our parents and our children. It might be more accurate to call us the “taffy generation” because often we are pulled in opposite directions at once. Who needs us more, our aging and increasingly dependent parents or our children, who depend on us for everything? Your parents and your children may seem to have completely different needs and interests, but there are things everyone can enjoy together that will help keep your head from spinning.
Got Books?
Did you know that many libraries have free activities for older people? Some branches offer computer skills classes, hold book clubs or feature speakers on relevant topics. Take your parents to the library for one of these events. They can learn important skills and maybe meet new friends while you spend quality time reading to a young one or help an older child with homework.
Get Out
Sunshine keeps spirits up and seniors, even those confined to a wheelchair, need fresh air. Take everyone to the park. The younger ones can run around while their grandparents people-watch, take a walk and soak up the sun.
Spoil Them
A tiny bit of pampering can go a long way. Schedule a gentle massage for your parent while you and your daughter get a manicure. Everyone will leave the spa feeling spoiled and rejuvenated.
Get Away
If your vacation is a multi-generational trip, find a resort that has activities for all ages. The spot should be wheelchair accessible and feature programs to keep your kids busy while you get some well-deserved rest. A kids club may keep youngsters happy all day while you golf with your parents or even take a well-earned nap.
Get Help
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Recruiting help doesn’t mean you are abandoning your parents. Ask local relatives to take on tasks such as keeping track of prescriptions or doctor’s appointments. Some volunteer agencies also offer services for seniors who need assistance with meals, appointments or errands.
Date Night
Don’t forget your spouse. Time alone with your spouse is doubly important when you have the double responsibility of caring for your parents and your kids. You need your spouse’s support and need to remember what it’s like to have fun just being you. If you can’t do this once a week, do it once a month. But do it! If your parents are healthy enough to watch your young ones, then you have built-in babysitters. If you need a sitter to watch both parents and children, get everyone under one roof and pay a sitter extra to make sure the elders take their medication and the youngsters go to bed on time.
What About You?
The first rule for taking care of others is to take care of yourself first. Get as much rest as you can and take a little time each day for yourself. Keep it short but build it into your schedule so your family knows this time is sacred. Go for a short walk, meditate, get a cup of coffee, or call a friend. Taking a moment to think, or doing something that feeds you, will give you the energy you need to carry on.
Caring for our parents and our children at the same time may seem almost impossible some days. With a little planning and a lot of patience, you can change this time of life from a period that is overwhelming into one that you will never regret.
Olivia Stanford is a lifestyle consultant and writes for dogwoodforest.com, an assisted living environment for
senior living in buckhead ga and other outlying areas of the greater Atlanta community.
Posted in Parenting